Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Conversation in Red Sox front office... probably.



Henry: Dude, our ratings are low. We gotta do something.
Lucchino: Hire a marketing firm!
Francona: We could try winning...
Lucchino: Marketing firm it is!
later...
Marketing firm: Dude, you need chicks.
Henry & Lucchino: How do we get chicks?
Marketing firm: Wine. Chicks love wine. And cute guys. Wine and cute guys.
Henry & Lucchino: Where are we going to find cute guys?
Marketing firm: Put them on the team.
Francona: What if they suck?
Marketing firm: That's the beauty of it. Chicks will still watch because they're cute. And they buy stuff. Lots of stuff.
Lucchino: Sacrifice winning for the sake of ratings you say? This is the perfect way to run a professional baseball team.
Henry: Totally. Best team ever.